Stress


That’s what it took for a letter from our family webpage and email host to get to us!

The letter was to tell us that our current debit details were out of date and that they had been unable to take a payment for the next year. Fine, but it also said that the account would be frozen if payment was not made within 8 days of the date of this letter! We updated all the details at about 8pm last night and the account was fine, but when I went to use our email this morning it had all been frozen.

I’ve called them and they’ve rerun the details and everything is uploaded again, but I have lost all emails sent to me after 11pm last night (when they froze it without checking that we’d changed the details). It’s so frustrating. I have no idea what may have been sent in that time. I know of one email from here and one from Facebook that have been lost, but what else? There’s definitely some missing from my yahoo groups, though I suppose I could get them on the web.

It’s just a pain. And then to top it all off this morning Mr H has gone to London for a conference. He called me an hour after he left home to ask whether his bag was sitting by the front door……yup! In his rush to get out and get a taxi to the station he left it behind. I did offer to take it into London for him (I just had enough time before his meeting), but he’s going to come with out it……silly boy!

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Mum and I were talking on Monday about how this year really cannot get much worse for our family…..well it just has.

Mr H discovered yesterday that he will almost certainly be made redundant from the end of January. We knew from reading BBC news online that there were going to be job losses in his company but we thought his group would be fairly safe. Even on Tuesday when he heard that 80 out of 400 in his department would go we thought it would be some from each team and that Mr H should be safe (though we weren’t taking it for granted). In a meeting yesterday Mr H and his colleagues were told that their whole team (30 of them) is being axed. Because so many are being made redundant there’ll be a 90 day consultaion period starting from Tuesday’s meeting, but he’s almost certainly not going to be saved. There’s a tiny chance that another part of the company will take him, but Mr H’s boss will also try and get there too and there’ll be only one (if that) job.

Most of Mr H’s colleagues are a grade up from him (either they’ve been there for years or have Phds) so have 3 month notice periods to work out, however he only has a month (if the promotion he’d been put up for had come through in time he’d be on 3 months too) so come the end of the 90 days that’s it. He’ll get a lump sum, but that’ll only just cover our costs if we need to move for a new job.

We sat and had a look last night and there are some jobs, but not near here. There is one near Mr H’s sister in Scotland, it’s a very long way from my family, but one place we’ve always said we’d consider if a job came up. It’s with another company in a similar field to his current company and a lot of them are making cuts at the moment, but this one is still recruiting while Mr H’s company has a recruitment freeze on most departments.

We had a lot of tears yesterday as our plans crumble (thank you R for taking the munchkin for a walk so we could take when Mr H came home), but we just have to pick ourselves up and look forward. It’s not going to be easy, I’m only just feeling like I’m settled here and starting to get myself involved with church and getting a good set of friends. We’re kind of hoping that there’ll be a job near here, though we haven’t seen many. I suspect we’ll end up moving. Thanks to inheritance from my Grandad we do have a reasonable amount of capital in the house and one option is for Mr H to set himself up as a consultant using this capital (plus there should be enough for us to live for a bit over a year as well without me working), I’m not sure I like this plan, I don’t think the uncertainty will do either of us much good at the moment.

We’ve got a lot of thinking to do and job hunting for him, baby #2 is definitely on hold for now, we need to have Mr H settled in a job before we can consider it again. I will do a short post for the munchkin’s birthdaym at some point but for today I just can’t concentrate on it.

I got back from my parents last night. The police have caught one of the scum that took Dad’s wallet from him and took Mum’s handbag and he’s admitted taking them, but is denying being involved in other thefts in the area that the police are sure he’s involved in. His fingerprints were found in Mum’s bedroom and in Dad’s bedroom which is why he admitted taking those. He’s making nasty allegations to try and explain why his finger prints were found upstairs, but he doesn’t know that my uncle was also at my parent’s when the handbag was taken and will testify that he didn’t go upstairs that day. He’s been remanded into custody (probably a good thing as the police said he tried to escape at court so probably would have tried to jump bail) which makes my Mum feel a little safer. The police have paid for lots of new locks on all their external doors and installed a camera in the hallway (only going to be there for 2 months or so) which is helping, but Mum’s still lost all her security, they’ve lived in that house for 29 years and hadn’t had a single problem until this.

Dad’s dementia is definitely worsening, he’s getting more confused. His driving is not good, Mum has got to contact the DVLA and his insurance company soon. I suspect he won’t be allowed to drive any more when she does so. He’s drinking more and smoking in the region on 60 cigarettes a day so Mum’s also worrying about how they’re going to afford that too. She’s had fantastic support from friends at their church, one couple have even lent Mum £500 to tide them over until the bank start being more co-operative. Dad may not be given any more bank cards, the bank are refusing at the moment as they’re saying Dad must have told the thieves the PINs, though he says he didn’t (I suspect he can’t remember or must have blanked it out, the thief says he found the PINs in some of Dad’s paper work in the living room – they definitely weren’t there).

We’re all (except Mr H who’s working) going to my gran’s in Wiltshire on Monday for a family holiday. Mum and Dad, L (with large bump) and T, Nana and the munchkin and I….I think there’ll be a rather full house! Mum’s going to be sleeping on the dining room floor so that the munchkin and I can have one spare room, L and T the double spare and Dad the third spare room (my gran has a huge house for just her). I’m hoping the time away will be a chance for us all to relax, especially Mum and Dad, though I suspect there’ll be several phone calls from the police sorting this, that and the other out while they’re there.

I’m back home next Friday, though I’m in London for a pamper day/photoshoot thing on Saturday (I won it after filling in something while I was in town shopping one day, I’m taking the munchkin’s God-mother V with me, the cheapest photo costs £50 so I probably won’t get any, I’ll put them up if I do) so I won’t be able to post then. Thank you to everyone who’s left a comment, it means a lot to me that people I don’t know any off line are thinking of us. I’ll try and come by and say hello once I’m back from my gran’s.

I’m heading up to my parents tomorrow so you won’t see a Fun Monday from me (not that I wear an apron if I can help it…).

Mum’s coping, trying to be strong – I’m not allowed to give her too many hugs. Dad’s not coping so well. Mum thinks he’s already forgetten the theft of her handbag, but he definitely hasn’t forgotten the night time one. He’s not eating much at all, drinking more again and smoking more. He’s also avoiding going out. I’m try an post a brief post while I’m there but otherwise I should be back home by the weekend.

Take care everyone.

Hello! Sorry I’ve not been to say hello to anyone recently and not looked at most of the Fun Monday posts.

I had a friend call me on Tuesday asking if she could come and stay for a couple of days to give her husband some space to get his act together, so she came on Wednesday.

Then on Wednesday afternoon Mum’s handbag was stolen from her dining room table in a distraction burglary (she was kept talking on the front step while someone went in the back door). Cue her having to organise changing locks on the house and cars as well as cancelling cards and mobile phone. I’ve been the family internet access getting numbers for this that and the other.

Mum went to stay at her mum’s yesterday (a planned trip) but was called home at midnight by the police after Dad was robbed of his wallet at knife point in their house. We assume it is the same gang. Dad remembers 3/4 men with at least one knife. They also went into Mum’s room and stole an old family ring she was given by her dad. Mum had left the door locked when she went to my gran’s but Dad unlocked it to let one of the cats out and the gang just walked in. I’m not sure what made them leave, but thankfully Dad wasn’t hurt just left very confused.

I’ve only spoken to Mum briefly this morning, she’s been too busy with the police, I got most of this from my Gran (I called her house for a chit chat with Mum). I’m hoping to go up to Yorkshire at some point this weekend if Mum’s happy with that, possibly this afternoon. Fun Monday may or may not happen on Monday.

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Update:

The police spent several hours at my parents this morning. They think they know who is responsible (at least one of the gang) due to his boasting in a pub, they’re also going to install cameras trained on the front and back doors in case the burglars return. I’m not going up at the moment, my sister and her husband are on their way (they’re nearer and haven’t got a little one just yet). I may still go up next week, but we’ll see how Mum (and Dad) are.

I started the year with good intentions for the diet and, thanks to PMT and a rotten cold, they’ve already gone a-stray. I’ve spent the weekend eating junk and more junk and lots of milk chocolate orange…..ooppss. I need to get myself back on track…I do want to lose some more weight before the munchkin’s baptism on the 21st. Stressing about our families coming up for that isn’t helping matters.

Having planned a nice dinner on at Saturday night for all those of our generation coming down (Mum and Dad are taking the grans out for dinner) Mr H’s siblings had other plans. Despite me texting to see if they’d be up for a murder mystery a week ago we only found out last night that G doesn’t fancy it so they all (D, G, J and S) decided they’d go to the pub instead! Thanks for telling me! Not to worry that I spent ages on Saturday wandering around Cambridge trying to find a shop that stocked the dinner party kits and then forked out for one, and that I’d been planning what to cook. My fantastic sister (I know I don’t say that about her very often!) has now offered to baby-sit for us so that Mr H and I can go out with his family since we don’t see them very often and the last time we were all together was over 2 years ago. I just wish that D&G had told us they didn’t fancy a murder mystery and then we’d just have had a young ones dinner. Don’t get me wrong it will be nice to go out with Mr H’s family, I just wish they’d talked to us.

I still need to work out what we’re doing for food after the baptism. Everyone is definately coming back here (hmmm…15 adults in our small house…) and we’re having some form of buffet, but apart from that I have no idea. We still haven’t finalise the cake….fruit or sponge? I don’t eat fruit cake, but a fruit cake will go further than a sponge cake….decisions!

Anyway, this post has taken about 1 1/2 hours to write in between cooking up veggies for the munchkin, feeding her and putting her down for a nap and it’s my turn to eat now. Bye!

Sorry about the negativity in the last post, I’d just had enough and was using my blog as a bit of a vent. Things are looking a bit better today. We’ve had a look at finances and worked out that we can absorb most of the cost of the repairs to the car relatively easily (phew!). We’ve also had a good think about meals and shopping, browsed Sainsbury’s online (internet shopping definately has it’s benefits!) and worked out where we can save money on our weekly shop. It’ll probably end up with us going to both Aldi and Sainsbury’s but they’re close to each other not too far away. It’s a shame they’re not in walking distance of us as that’d help the weight loss too. Mr H had to do some shopping after work yesterday (no fruit, veg or milk in the house!) and managed to spend far less than he normally does when he pops in mid-week.

The munchkin is being her usual charming self apart from throwing up all over me and her and the bath mat just as I was about to do her teeth last night (she’s been fine in herself ever since though!) and tearing up a book just after I repaired it from when she last got hold of it (I really need to lean how far she can reach now as I thought she couldn’t get it).

She found yesterday afternoon a little hard however, the leisure centre where we hold baby group was closed when we all got there (despite telling me that we could re-start after the Christmas break on the 3rd) so since I live so close I invited everyone round for a cuppa….oopps… When I said this there were only three of us with one more expected….2 minutes later another three drive up and there ends up being seven adults and nine children (7 babies/toddlers and the older 2 of one mum) in our living room! It all got a bit much for the little ones and some of them got very grumpy, but it was good to have some adult company in the daytime for a little bit.

Now I’ve got the gloomy job of getting the Christmas decorations down, I love having them up but need to get them down by twelth night, and we’re out on Saturday so I won’t be able to get Mr H to help then. I think I’ll have a hunt aound for a nice plant to put where the tree was so it’s not going to seem so empty when it’s gone.

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