May 2007


I’ve been tagged by Junior DocSpot to reveal 8 random things about me….so here I go…..

  1. If it hadn’t rained on Thursday I would have gone swimming in the Moray Firth with G. Bearing in mind that we were nearer the Arctic Circle and the capital of Norway than to London, I think I may have been mad, but I’m sad I didn’t get a chance to try it.
  2. I actually miss teaching the little (or not so little) brats maths….I don’t miss the paperwork however and all the marking.
  3. I can play the violin and got to grade 6 before giving up lessons to focus on school work, I wish I’d kept it up, I haven’t played since falling pregnant with the munchkin.
  4. I hate raspberries and raspberry flavoured things.
  5. I love the Shrek films. Mr H and I often have the soundtracks playing in the car.
  6. I love going into London, travelling round on the tube and feeding nuts to the squirrels in St James’ Park, just spending a day wandering a being a tourist. I haven’t done it in ages and really want to go again.
  7. I wouldn’t want to live in London though, I dream of living in the country and/or by the sea. At the moment both Mr H and I dream of living near where D and G live (in between Inverness and Lossiemouth) and would jump at the chance if there was the sort of job security for Mr H up there as there is down here.
  8. I had a breast reduction when I was 19 (H cup, or higher, I’m not sure, down to a D) and it’s been one of the best things I ever did. It gave me so much more confidence and self esteem. I definitely wouldn’t be the person I am now without it.

I’m supposed to tag 8 people now….but as most of the people I would tag have done it then if you fancy doing this consider yourself tagged!

Hello!

We had a lovely time away in Scotland. The weather held out most of the time and we all managed to get a little rest. Mr H spent a lot of time with his brother in law, G, climbing, cycling and chatting in the pub. G has since described Mr H as the brother he’s never had. He’s an only child and isn’t close to most of his cousins. I spent a lot of time with the munchkin and Mr H’s sister D.

I did get rather frustrated at one point about the amount of time Mr H was spending out with G. In the first 3 days he spent far more awake time with G than he did with me and the munchkin, I had to point out to him that I was on holiday too and wanted to spend some time with him as well. D and G were very good about baby sitting and let us go out for an afternoon and evening which was fab. We definitely needed the time out, I don’t know when we last had time to ourselves without worrying about the munchkin or listening out for her. Sadly however the munchkin was a complete nightmare for D and G and refused to eat her dinner or drink her milk so she went to bed with an empty stomach. She’s got two molars coming through and they’re being difficult.

The munchkin had her first experience of the beach and the sea and loved it, though the water was rather cold, she didn’t spend much time paddling, but loved playing in the sand (so did Mr H!). I’ll try and upload some pictures later this week, they’re all still on the camera at the moment.

Another bonus of the week was that D and G are both following Slimming World as well, so with the moral support from the three of us we’ve all stuck to it rather well, albeit using the vast majority of our sins on alcohol! I’ve got a bit more inspiration and motivation now and really hoping to keep it up. I’ve learnt a few new recipes and today cooked cous cous for the first time! It was yummy!

We called at Mum and Dad’s on the way back form Scotland. It was the first time I’d seen Dad since he’s been ill and it was a bit hard at times. He’s still pretty much in denial that he has a problem with his memory, though he can’t deny the blood pressure and eye sight issues. He’s seeing the opthalmologist tomorrow and hopefully there’ll at least be some answers to the eye problem there. While we were up he completely lost the keys to church and home, as well as forgetting to change the altar frontals front white to red, despite having been reminded many times and mentioning it himself just before he left on Saturday night to prepare church for the Sunday services. I’m finding it really hard to be at all positive about the long term, my mind is constantly going back to the idea that this all could be a brain tumour….I’m really hoping it’s not, but I can’t seem to help it.

Now I’m back I’m determined to really get on top of the housework. It’s fallen a little by the wayside and I really want to get the house tidy and more organised. I’ve had a good start by attacking the bathroom sink which gets really limescaley thanks to the crummy water around here. It’s not quite shining, but it’s as good as I can get it at the moment. Tomorrow I want to clean the bath and shower and get rid of the limescale there.

I hope you all had good weeks, I’m going to try and catch up with your blogs over the next few days, it may take me a while, especially if I do manage to get he housework under control…..

A couple of commenters have said that they’re a bit envious of my faith….to me that’s something new. I’ve always been someone envious of the faith of others. I’ve felt God working in me before but on Sunday it was just such a clear feeling of His support that it was amazing.

My faith definitely has up and down times, times when I feel really close to God and that He’s with me and supporting me so much and times when I really question everything. I was completely on a down time a few weeks ago, but when I talk to God and try to accept His help and encouragement it makes such a difference to everything. Going to a church where I feel comfortable and part of a family really helps me, I’m not someone who could be like a hermit and live in isolation with my faith. I need to be able to talk to others and receive teaching from ‘elders’ (or in my case usually the vicar!). Something that really helps me to feel close to God is to try and spend time with him each day (not easy with the munchkin, but I try as often as possible), something else is for me to go to church whenever we can. When we’ve been busy and not made it for a few weeks it definitely makes a difference to how I feel. You may have noticed from my other posts that I’m not the most articulate of people, but I’m trying…. That’s a brief bit about my faith, if you want to ask me anything about it, do and I’ll try to answer another time.

If you are interested in finding out more about God (and Christianity generally) I really can recommend looking at the Alpha course. It’s an introduction to the Christian faith that gives you the opportunity to ask questions and discuss ideas with others. There are no expectations on you to join the church (or there shouldn’t be), it’s just an opportunity to find out more. I went on it a few years ago when I was having a lot of questions and it really have me the chance to think about what I believed and what others believed too.

Hello! My new phone is great! The keyboard is a little small, but I’m getting used to it (hopefully the diet will shrink my fat fingers a bit as well as the jelly belly!). I’m able to run most of the applications I had on my old Sony Clie. What we’ll hopefully do before we go away is set up the Bible software on there and get me some study notes of some sort to always have with me. The camera’s surprisingly good, it’s quite nice to have a picture of Mr H come up when we calls me 🙂

Caramaena – it’s definitely been worth getting though I will definitely need the protective case that’s on order as I’m worried about damaging the touchscreen in my bag when I’m out. It’s much easier to have diary/address book/phone all as one rather than several bits cluttering up my bag.

Mum did manage to go with Dad on Monday….the problem with his eye is not a bleed, the doctor isn’t sure why he has little sight in it but had referred him to an opthalmologist who he’ll see at the end of the month. His blood pressure hasn’t dropped so his medication has been upped. Dad has had a lump on the right side of his face for ages, but lately it’s grown a bit more and I’m getting concerned that that has links with his memory and eye sight, though Mum said the doctor’s haven’t commented on it at all…..I’m desperately trying not to Google anything else as I know sight problems (and memory loss) can be linked with brain tumours and I’m trying to not go there….

The munchkin is still incrediably snotty, we’ve had to avoid toddler group today as she looks awful and I don’t want the other parents to think I’m just willing to spread the bug around (though she did pick the cold up from there). We’re having fights every time I try to wipe her nose, she just hates it. It’s making her a little clingy and rather less able to cope with being told off…..we’re getting tantrums of sorts when normally she’d just wander off. Hopefully the snot will ease soon, though the 9 day cold rule (3 days to come, 3 with you and 3 to go – something Mum swears by) would mean that it’ll be Saturday before she’s better as it all started on Friday last week.

I’m doing ok, still feeling much higher than last week, though a useless online PDA company have not helped by failing to tell us items we ordered were out of stock until we rang yesterday evening to find out why they hadn’t arrived after I’d waited in all day for them! Grrr! Diet was not great yesterday as we (me and Mr H) were both tired and a little short fused….. but it was still better than some days last week. I did lose 1 1/2 lbs this week which was ok, I’d hoped for more, but a loss is a loss and more than makes up for the previous week’s gain. I’m going to try and be really good today and before we go away tomorrow, and since it was my sister in law that introduced me to Slimming World I shouldn’t do too badly when we’re with them…..that’s the theory anyway! I sure hope it works and I come back from Scotland with a loss!

Hello! There’s a much happier H writing this morning. (even happier now as the door bell has just interupted me with the delivery of my new phone! It looks great, though I need to charge it before I can check it out)

I’m feeling so much more in control and on top of things today, and as far as I can tell as much as anything else it’s feeling that God is in control and helping take the weight from my shoulders. In church yesterday the vicar’s sermon was about intimacy with God and letting Him into our lives and he gave us a quiet time where we could just open ourselvs up to God and I really felt that He came and touched me. I just felt the weight lifting from me and a strong feeling that God is with me and supporting me at the moment. The feeling of support and lightness on my shoulders is still with me this morning.

I knew that I needed to go to church yesterday no matter what and now I feel it’s because God wanted me there to remind me that I just need to ask for His support and help and He’ll be there. I’m feeling so much more confident about the days and weeks ahead now, rather than worried the depression is returning.

We’ve had an interesting weekend this weekend. The munchkin has a streaming cold, she wakes up ok, but by lunchtime her nose is dripping and she’s getting very grumpy. My wrist is still giving me intermittant pain (though yesterday it was my own fault as I forget to take my tablets – I should have had 3, I forgot them all!). Mr H is very tired and trying to take some of the load from me so as not to worsen my wrist so he was a tad grumpy at times, though seeing what a difference God had made to me did perk him up a bit too.

Mr H watched Eurovision for the first time with me on Saturday, I love the pure cheesiness and Terry Wogan’s fabulous (and incrediably un PC at times) commentary but Mr H thought it would be awful, but he actually enjoyed it, mainly Mr Wogan though. I was quite shocked by how political the voting ended up being though, too many people voting for their allies and neighbours and not the songs (though the song that won was good). I’m not surprised how badly our song did though, it was too much in the 90s cheesy pop vein to do well.

Amazingly I’m even feeling positive about housework at the moment and getting back on top of it all, so today I need to (on top of my normal bits) clean the hob again, and hoover all downstairs.

My diet is back on track, I weigh in tonight and I’m hoping for a 2 lb or so loss…..it’s only been 4/5 days since last weigh in and getting myslef back on track though so maybe1 lb….anything would be good though.

I’m still a little worried about Dad. He’s going back to the doctors today (Mum’s working on him to allow her to go with him). I had my first experience of my memory loss on Friday when he rang to ask me about the trust fund money, he asked me for the same information 4/5 times in 10 minutes. Mum says he’s getting more withdrawn and he’s admitted that he’s had a bleed into his eye and he’s having a little trouble seeing out of it. Dad has blamed the bleed on the medication and has stopped taking it……we’re not thrilled with that idea….we think that the medication just hasn’t had time to kick in and the bleed is due to his high blood pressure. If Mum manages to go to the doctors with Dad then she is going to make sure the doctor knows about the bleed.

That seems to have been what my life has been living by. If anything has been able to go wrong it has done.

It’s been such a frustrating week, and I can’t even work out what started it all off.

I think it may have been my mobile deciding that it wasn’t going to tell me when it was running out of battery and just dying and then deciding that actually ringing when someone called me was optional! Mr H and I spent a little time discussing what sort of phone to get me. I wanted a smartphone so I didn’t have to carry a diary/address book around with me as well as a phone. H agreed to that and then suggested I get one with a Palm operating system as we already have palm software (he’s had Palm OS PDAs for as long as I’ve known him). That left us with a Treo,unless we bought second hand from eBay with not much idea of the actual condition of the phone we were left with the 650 model from Palm’s partner that sells refurbished models. Those phone are so expensive……it’s costing us £137.50 (plus needing to buy an SD card for extra memory for books/music on there). As soon as we decided that’s what we were going to get the supplier sold out! I’ve spent the last couple of days refreshing the stock list on the web and as soon as one came in yesterday we ordered it. Hopefully it’ll arrive early next week and the crapness that is my current phone can go in the bin.

I’ve had a crap week with the diet this week, at weigh in on Wednesday (delayed because of the bank holiday) I’d put on a pound and I’m not really surprised, I half expected it to be more, I’ve eaten so badly this week. When I’m finding life hard I find myself relying on food to lift my mood and with Mr H being the skinny runt he is there’s always junk food around and I found myself snacking away again. I was better yesterday, and am erally trying hard today to get back on track.

Another nightmare has been trying to work out whether we want a new laptop, whether cheap one from Aldi was good enough for us (the advert for that prompted all the discussions) and whether we could afford it. We decided that yes we wanted one, yes the Aldi one was just about good enough and yes we could afford it. So we trooped off to Aldi yesterday, I walked in the door 5 minutes after it opened and promptly heard the manager saying to the people in the queue (8ish people) that he’d just sold the last one! There can have been no more than 7/8 laptops for the whole store! When we pulled into the car park it was just after 9 and there were 3 people just getting into cars with laptops and I saw another couple leaving the store with them. I walked back out of the store (the laptop was all we wanted) to see Mr H just leaving to go on to work. The plan had been that he’d drop me off and I’d get the bus home again complete with laptop and munchkin, but I did hope that when I came out so promptly he’d still be there and would take me home and then work from the local site for the morning….too late. I had to wait 45 minutes for the bus and head home empty handed on my own.

I was so close to crying, it’s not taken much to set me off all week (I split the munchkin’s bedtime milk on Wednesday and had to get Mr H to clean it up as I couldn’t deal with it). It’s almost as bad as I was this time last year when I was put on ADs by the doctor, I’m going to try and sort my mood out with a decent diet and more exercise and see if that helps first before going back to the GP. I’m also hoping that going away to stay in Scotland with Mr H’s sister and husband will help too. We’re setting off on Thursday, Mum’s paid for us to stop over near Birmingham so we don’t have to do 500+ miles in a day (she’s a star!), should be there by Friday tea-time. We’re there until the following Friday and then calling at Mum and Dad’s on the way home to see them and my old school friends. Hopefully I’ll get some rest, Mr H has said that he’ll try and make sure I do. If I’m not feeling better once we’re home again I think I need to see the doctor and see what he suggests.

I’ve been very lax on commenting this week…I haven’t even read most blogs I usually do, hopefully next week I’ll be a bit better. Shout at me if you think I should ahve come by and said hi!

…no sooner do I wean myself off my addiction to the gorgeousness that is Terry’s Chocolate Orange (thanks to the diet) than I find myself addicted to something else.

Astonishingly for me it’s not food related….shock horror….it’s the wonder that is Facebook.

I logged onto there a couple of months ago having seen an article about it on the BBC News site and found a couple of friends also had profiles there. As time has gone on more and more of my friends are finding the site and it’s been so good to be back in touch with people I’ve barely seen since I left school (ok, so that’s only 8 years, but still….). I’ve been chatting to one of my best friends from sixth form (ok, so I also fancied him rotten all through that time…….not quite sure now what I saw in him, though he’s still lovely, I don’t find him good looking now……s’alright Mr H you have nothing to worry about!).

We’re going to try and arrange a night out in the pub we spent rather a lot of weekends in for the spring bank holiday weekend as all the teachers amoungst our group should be free to go back to sunny Bradford and I’m able to get Mr H to drop me and the munchkin there on our way home from staying with the sister-in-law in Scotland the week before. It’ll be great to try and get everyone back together again, I’ve so many great memories from the pub and our sixth form days, it’d be great to get the whole gang back together again.

Thanks to Facebook I’m also in touch more with my lovely cousin who’s just about to do her finals, we’d chat on MSN very occasionally, but now we chat once a week or so.

I’m finding myself on there several times a day checking out who has updated what and what people are doing. It’s great….but I’m getting so addicted to it….hopefully our week away later this month will help this one!

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